On my mind. . .

- If it can't withstand some wind, how can we expect the Bay Bridge to make it through the next big quake?
- After much thought and research I have realized that anabolic steroids are not the devil. I've been reading a lot on this and listening to quite a few podcasts (and following up on the entailed statements), and don't see how anyone can justify the amount of time and taxpayer dollars that goes into prosecuting individuals trafficking in/possessing these steroids.
- I am against the use of anabolic steroids for performance unless said organization explicitly allows for them in their bylaws.
- I need to get a part time job.
- I need to work on my personal statement
- I like almond butter better than almonds.
- Figure/Fitness/FBB competitions are oddly entertaining. I find the criteria frustratingly confusing, am not a big fan of posing in bikinis, and think the effort the competitors go to in terms of dieting/training is insane. Nevertheless, I find the fitness routines to be inspiring (particularly the 45 second routine that was just fazed out), the dedication of the competitors to be impressive (and in some cases, troubling), and the psychological reaction to the post-show weight regain to be fascinating. I guess the idea of losing all that weight while knowing that there will be a fixed point at which some will be regained both purposefully (for muscle gain) and necessarily.
- how ironic it is that men seem to prefer the offseason body of a competitor while women prefer their competition look
- how much my hip hurts
- that my chiropractor will probably hit me again tomorrow when I admit to stepping on the stairmill after telling him I would (try to) avoid it.
- that I didn't want to do lunges until the chiro told me that can't do any lifting and especially not squats or lunges.

.... and much much more.

I hate secrets

Apparently they've been trying to hide our financial situation from me. As in we are in the red. Monthly. Fuck.

Of course I get the bare minimum in foods, no extras like magazines or coffee, library books only, use as little electricity as possible.... So I'm cutting back on my one luxury - massages (if you talked to me for 10 minutes you'd know why they are there) are being cut in half.

I spend my weeks looking forward to them. They are the ONLY thing in my life that I have to look forward to on a regular basis. I know I'm horribly spoiled for having them, but considering the fact that I wake up in pain throughout the night....they've been a lifesaver.

Next - therapy. Cutting back there as well. Sessions are being halved. Already called my T. Same with the CMT.

I won't mention the other stuff... less significant, but still gone.

The job and volunteer situation is a whole different mess for another day. It is simply too much to cope with all at one time. Especially minutes after getting home following my massage & therapy. Yep, THAT is when this lovely truth was revealed to me.

And guess who made that error in judgement?

The Daft And Dense one. That is who.

Body Image & Media

I was checking out Harriet Brown's blog and noticed a post about a psych research study in need of participants:

"Tina Indalecio, who's getting her PhD at Fielding Graduate University, is running a survey on how advertising media affects people with eating disorder or body image issues.

I'm all for anything that helps with research around eating disorders, because God knows there's not very much of it.

So if you'd like to help Tina, you can read more about her research and/or take her survey here. The password you'll need is temp1212. The deadline for participating is Wednesday, October 28, by 11:45p.m."

It only takes a couple minutes, so help a grad student out and add a few extra clicks to your day!

I have an opinion, so shoot me!

I feel like I signed up to be on a "Most Hated' list today.

Oh well. Sucks, but sometimes honesty hurts. Me.

Questions without answers

Why is it so much easier to over-train than under-train?

Psychologically?

Physically?

Why is it easier to assume you have to physically work harder for your goals than necessary?

And why do you have to stop what you are doing in order for an injury to go away? (ok, yes, this one is answerable. I just needed to whine)

Stupid hip

You know you overdid it one too many days in a row when your quad muscles are chronically seized up.

Stupid me.

Read, Visit, & Save

Whether you need something near:

http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Section=Your_Local_NAMI&Template=/CustomSource/AffiliateFinder.cfm

http://www.211database.org

Or just a voice on a line

Suicide Prevention
800.273.TALK
800.SUICIDE

Crisis Intervention
800.833.2900

Psych Surveys

One thing about me: I love reading about human psychology. I was recently tipped off on a few sites where people can go and participate in/help out professional psychology researchers by participating in online surveys. So far I've done a few and definitely plan on doing some more.

socialpsychology.org/expts

One thing to note is that not all of the surveys are professional (some are student), so be wary of the different standards that are applied to the conduct of both types. Simply put, professional research surveys are held to a higher standard and will hold more weight as they are much more thoroughly vetted.

Point of pride

Whatever my issues with food/body image/exercise might suggest, I have to say one thing I'm proud of:

I eat REAL food.

My milk has some fat.

My cottage cheese has more fat.

My salads are topping with fat.

And my nut butters REVEL in their fattiness.

And carbs?

There too. :-)